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The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I bokep was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for crot caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, porn she rolled her eyes and porn declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokep or porn sex worker.

Now, porn according bokep to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, porn it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and memek all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot crot the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. memek In other words, porn you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: porn there’s sex as performance art, porn and bokep sex as genuine intimacy. And memek when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokeh trusts her partner and memek is not fearing porn for crot a fragile male ego, porn she’s far more likely to gently memek sigh memek and crot moan than shriek like the rabid bokep bokeh super-vixen in my bokeh Parisian hotel.

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In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, crot female contributors regularly confessed bokep to faking orgasms. It was generally on bokeh an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, bokeh so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for bokep other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and memek ‘manipulation’, crot and bokeh that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ bokeh in order to encourage their memek partners over the finishing line, crot so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being bokep faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: porn ‘I’m enjoying this, bokeh but can you bokep get a bloomin’ move on.’ bokep Sound familiar, bokep ladies?

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The only other reason to screech bokep like a demented hyena is if your sex bokeh education comes from porn, bokeh where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland bokep said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: bokep ‘As far as I’m concerned, memek that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, porn only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

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In their book, porn Sex At Dawn, crot Christopher Ryan and memek Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during bokeh sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokeh I can understand bokeh the need to advertise. But if you’re not, porn then men bokep should take heed: crot the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris